autumn rambling 2

This year, ahhh, this year has been so different. I typically observe the changing of the seasons. I feel changes with some angst. Particularly autumn. If you know me very well you realize I have this  love/hate relationship with autumn. I believe the hate part of it is largely due to my Seasonal Affective Disorder, SAD. However there is something more to this. Many people react in a similiar fashion to the arrival of spring as well, something to do with air pressure changes, major changes of any sort. 
But I ramble. I feel the need to apologize for the ramble, take it or leave it. My thoughts have been filled with rambling it seems. And I have chosen not to share. There seem to be trends in art blogs. I do not know if you have noticed. I certainly have. 
When I started blogging, I tried to share much of my anxiety, my fears, my concerns. I believed I might help other people going through similiar situations. I still believe I found some very good life time friends because of that sharing. In the last few years the trend seemed to change to holding all your personal "stuff" inside. Kind of like "don't worry ~ be happy", especially with the face you showed to the world. I went along with it even though I was uncertain about it. I was not as inclined to post. I began to get behind with sharing my photos and art. I was not sure what was all right to say and what not. At the time I was going through some very heavy duty challenges. Probably sharing would have been beneficial. I chose not to share. That was easier than trying to decide what to say, what not to say. Sigh. And then there were the times when I had perhaps said too much. I felt guilt. That was not good.
Ahhh, the rambling.
This past year has been very tough. This past year I have been very strong. 
Remember ~ "I am strong. I am free. I have the right to be me." Those words were a wonderful mantra. I go back to them often. Sometimes I forget though. I must try to remind myself.

ramble, ramble 

 
Once again a return to sharing experiences, feelings, hardships, challenges, joys. Once again I think I too may feel more comfortable about choosing the right moments, pieces to share.

Angels be with you my friends.

"Have you ever heard the wonderful silence just before the dawn? Or the quiet and calm just as a storm ends? Or perhaps you know the silence when you haven’t the answer to a question you’ve been asked, or the hush of a country road at night, or the expectant pause of a room full of people when someone is just about to speak, or, most beautiful of all, the moment after the door closes and you’re alone in the whole house? Each one is different, you know, and all very beautiful if you listen carefully." ~ Norton Juster